Funny

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Back in 2006 when I attended Cisco Networkers  (or NotWorkers as it’s often referred).

I purchased a Cisco branded Skagen watch.  The price was right, and I was in a mood for a watch and had been looking at Skagen for a while since they are so light and ‘thin’.

On the way home I noticed it wasn’t keeping time and that bothered me.   It wasn’t until a couple weeks later that I noticed if you bumped it at all, the minute hand would just ‘move’.    It would keep time just fine sitting on the desk, just don’t subject it to any movement.  :(

I called Cisco Marketing to see if they’d swap me out.   Turns out they were the last batch and since Cisco was in the process of changing logo’s there wouldn’t be anymore.

They suggested I send it to Skagen since it had a limited lifetime warranty.

Well I never did, that was until about a month ago.  I printed out the RMA form, included Credit card info fully expecting to be dinged $30 bucks or so for the repair.

A couple of weeks passed and I noticed that Skagen had only dinged me $8.95 (plus the cost of shipping it to them).  Which appears is the standard fee for warranty repair.   (yes a fee for warranty work, go figure).

I was giddy, looking forward to getting a nice and relatively new watch back.

It arrived today.

I tore open the envelope, pulled out the slip and read it.  Work performed Reseal Case & Attached Minute Hand!.

Then I pulled out the box congaing the watch.   I couldn’t believe my eyes.

Where was the minute hand?  Floating around the number 1 and 2 on the dial, completely detached from the movement.   Pfffft.

See:
(in the photo it’s floating over the #3)

So I turned it over to my wife to handle.  She’s good with stuff like that.  At first they wanted me to ship it to them again (at my cost) and that wasn’t going to fly.

But in the end they are supposed to take care of me.   They are going to build me a watch.  (sans the Cisco Logo) and ship it to me and pick up the bumb fix.

I’ll update if that doesn’t happen.

(Sent to me via a co-worker and worthy of posting)

Suppose that every day, 10 men go out for beer and the bill for all 10 comes to $100.
If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:

  • The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
  • The fifth would pay $1.
  • The sixth would pay $3.
  • The seventh would pay $7.
  • The eighth would pay $12.
  • The ninth would pay $18.
  • The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.

So, that’s what they decided to do.

The 10 men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve.

"Since you are all such good customers," he said, "I’m going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20."

Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.

The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes, so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free.

But what about the other six men – the paying customers?

How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his "fair share?"

They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33.

But if they subtracted that from everybody’s share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer.

So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man’s bill by roughly the same proportion, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay.

And so:

  • The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
  • The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33% savings).
  • The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28% savings).
  • The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
  • The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
  • The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).
    Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free.

But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.
"I only got a dollar out of the $20," declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man, "but he got $10!"

"’Yeah, that’s right," exclaimed the fifth man. "I only saved a dollar, too. It’s unfair that he got 10 times more than I!"

"That’s true!" shouted the seventh man. "Why should he get $10 back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!"

"Wait a minute," yelled the first four men in unison. "We didn’t get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!"

The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.

The next night, the tenth man didn’t show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had beers without him.

When it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn’t have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works.

The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction.

Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore.

In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.

For those who understand, no explanation is needed.
For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.

Best Costume at Seapine

Mike Ambrus: Pointy Haired Boss

Awesome…

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IMG_0045

IMG_0039

NOoMWSBH

A buddy of mine passed this along:

“Just because I have heavily gelled, jet-black, slicked-back hair does not mean I can’t lead a normal, productive life,” Kettering, OH native Martin Sutulovich said. “I’m not consumed by an insatiable thirst for power, I know nothing about the high-pressure world of real-estate speculation, and I have a wife and kids whom I love very much. The last thing I want to do is murder them, cut them up into tiny pieces, bag them up, and put them out with the trash, but when strangers look at me, that’s all they think.”

via the Onion, enjoy…

Greener Pastures

Or… “Not everyone that shows up is there to help”

:)

cow3

IMG 0014

The problem with having any amount of land is that people seem to think they can just use it. Our property is situated in such a way that it’s pretty convenient to ‘cut through’ it. We’ve tried to discourage that as much as possible. It is ‘fenced’ but that doesn’t seem to stop folks.

This morning was exciting. I was woken up by one of the girls letting me know there were kids in our field again. Last year they had built a hide out among the power lines. Which as far as that goes doesn’t bother me as much as they had taken tools from the barn to build their hide-out.

I’ve scared the bejezus out of the kids in the past, and have waited until they have crossed our property only to make them turn around and go back. Apparently this isn’t enough.

So I hopped up got dressed, grabbed the Excursion and headed out to the field and caught one of those nasty trespassers. I kindly explained that this was private property, and he was trespassing and I didn’t want to see him here again. Then I asked where his friends were, and he said there were a couple ‘over there’.

Over there as it turns out was a complete camp, with tents, tables, chairs, and a roaring fire.

Technically though it was on our neighbors property but I knew they didn’t have permission. So I decided to play camp counselor.

I popped in and introduced myself, let them know they were where they didn’t belong. I asked them to pack up and move along. They weren’t very enthusiastic, (I’m not sure I would have been either having slept through the cold last night). I explained to them that the Sheriff was on his way and if they left before then, well, that be in their best interest. Still they didn’t seem to move too fast, which was unfortunate for them.

Apparently this camp site has been there for a while. Possibly even last summer, which just proves my neighbor isn’t all that in tune with what happens at his property.

The ‘Law’ showed up, and hassled them a bit, and made them clean up. I think that probably scared them enough. Not like I ever did anything like that when I was a kid :)

We assume they’ll spread the word that the camp site is closed. We’ll keep an eye on it and have something special for the next round of visitors.

I’m thinking maybe we’ll drop a nice stink bomb in the middle of their camp at 6am next time.

IMG 0015

I had tried to take photos of the camp site but my camera had spent the night on the bike and was essentially frozen. By the time the ordeal was over, it was working again.

It’s always something.

Merry Christmas?

Blogworthy email spam :)

For My Democrat Friends:

“Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. This is not intended to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor that it is the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes.

By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself, himself, theirself, or others, is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.”

For My Republican Friends:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

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While poking around online looking for Christmas gift ideas, under the category “Wife”, this was suggested on buy.com.

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Uhm, I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid… Aint no way I’m giving my wife a book about dieting.

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Good Ol Jack.

‘When I saw the old bum pushing his grocery cart down the street, at first I felt sorry for him. But then when I saw what was in his cart I thought, ‘Well, no wonder you’re a bum, look at the dumb things you bought.’
-Jack Handy

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It makes me mad when I go to all the trouble of having Martha cook up about a hundred drumsticks, then the guy at the Marine land says, ‘You can’t throw chicken to the dolphins. They eat fish.’ Sure they eat fish, if that’s all you give them. Man, wise up.
-Jack Handy :)

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